640-Obsessions-14

14-2003-0511-eric-scott-day-for-night-floor-06The phone ringing throws me into a brief panic.

In a work day, there’s simply too many sales calls incoming to risk the gamble of ending up on the phone talking to a wasteful stranger, and not to have it be a one-sided call you’d otherwise prefer to hang up on.

“It’s someone who wants something from me. They already have their spiel worked out. And they’re banking upon having the advantage of preparation, hoping I won’t be quick enough to say no.”

“I hate to disappoint people. That’s always discouraging; to know you produced a deliberate “non”-result. It’s two-fold.”

“This person probably knows this intuitively, about the nature of all people, and knows already how hard this will be for me. That is part of their hidden advantage — it’s the guilt.”

“If I don’t answer it, and they don’t leave a message, then that is all the confirmation I need, and my theory must have been correct.”

Is my panic of answering the telephone, simply a resistance to discouragement?